The older I get, the less sure I am about anything. What is life but greys?
We humans love a false binary, don’t we?
Particularly any juxtapositions or tensions that pit love against money.
A dream job or a job that pays well?
Marry someone broke who loves you or someone rich and emotionally unavailable?
A particularly interesting one is around easy vs hard. Sometimes it feels downright criminal to charge well for things that come easily to you, that you’re naturally good at, where talent is your tailwind. Good things aren’t supposed to be easy. Hard work pays off. (And there’s nuance here. Of course we should follow and play to our innate gifts. It’s okay to be rewarded for those. There is no prize for suffering and toiling to hone skills you don’t enjoy, fighting your natural instincts all the way. And work is still work. I’m much better at doing things with words than I am at doing anything with spreadsheets, or even remembering to ask for ID of anyone trying to get into an R16 movie. Yet writing is still work. I still procrastinate, second-guess, etc.)
It’s how we’re wired. Black and white is tidy and clean. Fast/slow. Win/lose. Boy/girl. Right/wrong. High/low.
My kiddo often likes to ask for a definitive answer. What’s best (between these 2 things)? And thanks to YouTube, he now also likes to pose ‘would you rather’ questions. Walk over nails or Lego pieces? Be rich and lonely or broke with lots of friends and family?
But rarely is it ever so clearcut. I inevitably launch into a winding explanation - usually while driving, so I’m half in it and half not, my thoughts and words wandering all over the show - as I try to break down the nuance and context that goes into defining ‘best’.
It’s so much easier when things are black and white. Good and bad. Like in the movies. But layering such simplistic dualities over the messy fabric of life doesn’t tend to work so well.
In this ep:
what I loved about being on the debating team
my favourite Dr Becky refrains
extending grace and kindness to myself
Runtime: 5 mins 14 secs, or about as long as it takes to do your nails since it’s summer 💅
